The Beauty World Is Losing It Over This Viral X-Rated Lipstick, so I Tried It

I knew that the arrival of my order was going to be a moment in itself. The lipstick came packaged in a gorgeous silver box with an image of the product printed on it. I took a deep breath and opened it. There it was. Honestly, if I had my own makeup brand, this is the kind of thing I’d make too. Picking it up, I was immediately surprised at its heft. Now, this is where I made a mistake. For journalistic purposes, I wanted to see how much it weighed and grabbed my kitchen scale. I didn’t realize the metal case would be slippery against the scale’s tempered glass, and it slid off and fell right on my toe. (There may or may not be video proof of this tragic scenario.) For a minute, I was afraid that I’d have to tell the world that I broke my toe on a penis-shaped lipstick, but thankfully, all it needed was some ice. And since you may be curious, it weighs a little over 10 ounces.

I bought Cardinal, the red shade, which is not a surprise to anyone who’s had to hear me talk about lipstick for the past 20 years. The brand describes it as a “satin-slick color” with intense color payoff, and it lives up to its description. I was ecstatic that the lipstick went on easily and already looked lush and bright with just one application. It also felt secure on my lips, almost like a matte, but was very comfortable. This is all thanks to a slew of hydrating botanicals and plant oils: açaí-berry oil, cherry-seed oil, pomegranate-seed oil, sweet almond, and jojoba oil. I fixed and defined the edges of my lips with Too Faced Lady Bold Waterproof Longwear Lip Liner ($16) and was good to go. While it’s not transfer-proof, the Colour Infusion Lipstick lasted a long time on my lips. It didn’t hold up against eating, so I needed to reapply, but it settled into a nice worn rouge.

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