sex relationships

I first spotted my husband Richard (or Dick, or Dickie) on the night bus, on another night of shuttling across London on public transport for a party. It is incredible how most couples imbue their first meeting with a certain majesty, a…

When people ask me about my favorite novel, I only ever have one answer. In some ways I wish it were Middlemarch or Rebecca or something, because those books are very long, and as a result of this, people think you are intelligent if you…

When it comes to affairs of the heart, we are all beginners. Some of us, however, at least speak with authority. Introducing Shon Faye, author of The Transgender Issue (2021) and the forthcoming Love in Exile (2025), whose advice caught our…

Every man has something wrong with him. And I don’t mean that in the jaded, millennial, “men are trash” way. I mean it objectively, and with a sense of genuine compassion: No one’s perfect—especially men.Given this, I think there’s some…

“No chance you’re awake, is there?” His words lit up my phone somewhere around 6 a.m. I saw them when I woke up fresh-faced and smug after an early night at 8 a.m. My stomach flipped. But it was also one of those rare scenarios where I knew…

Nothing captures our collective imagination quite like falling in love. The heady and hormone-filled first days of dating, when life is a rush of cute messages, exchanged songs, little promises made. When you’re running on the most…

I sat on the wooden stool and tried to get comfy. The sun went down and the sky turned so pink and blue it looked like one of those bubblegum bottle candies and everyone started taking pictures of it. He got his phone out and I thought,…

I think the fact that this occurred within the context of polyamory is less important, actually. It can and does happen every day to people who are monogamous. If you have only ever loved your primary partner until now and that love…

Here are some things I learned about myself in my 20s: I am naturally introverted, and need at least two days to recover in between hangs; I will never be a talented baker because I don’t like following instructions; and I’m fairly…

The question “Do you want to go for a drink sometime?” is basically shorthand for asking someone to go on a date with you. And like so many others, a bar date is my go-to for my first time going out with someone new. Bars, after all, are…