Madhuri Dixit: Stardom doesn’t define me, I get the power to define fame – Times of India

Congratulations for ‘The Fame Game’! One interesting and very admirable trait in Anamika is that she wants to be a mother, daughter, and a human being first, and then an actor. Since you’ve been around in this industry for years, how necessary do you think it is to hold on to those authentic identities and not let your work define your self-esteem and self-worth?

I think that’s very important and it doesn’t happen in Anamika’s case. But it’s very important like I always say, and stardom doesn’t define me. I am a very different person, I like to do things. I like to learn new things. I like to experiment, I don’t get stuck in a mould. I don’t want to do that. And just because I’m a star, it does not mean anything.

For me, what is more important is my kids, my family, my own happiness, my fan base. I like to give them glimpses through Twitter or whatever. But that’s also in my control how much I say and how much I don’t. They say because of social media, you have to be out there. You have to say everything. That’s not true. You can pick and choose how much you want to be out, and my fans respect that. So I don’t think stardom should ever define you. You should define stardom. What you do should define your stardom.

The show specifically talks about the cost of fame. Personally, what has been the biggest price that you have had to pay for the fame that’s come to you?


I will say by and large, my life has been quite good. I’ve never had to really pay any big price for fame because that’s the way I’ve treated fame. For me, fame is just a byproduct of what I do. Every day in the morning, I’m excited to face the camera. I’m playing this character today. And that’s what excites me. Everything that happens is for me in peripheral vision. You know, my focus is my art, whether I’m dancing, singing or acting. My focus is my family when I’m at home, everything to do with the kids. I want to know what they are doing, where they are and all that. So for me, I have managed to keep those two very separate. So I don’t think fame has affected me yet in any negative way.

When it comes to the leading lady, the audience has usually seen them as the so-called perfect woman onscreen. But as an actress when you get to play these flawed characters with varied emotions, how liberating is it?

None of us is perfect. Everyone is made up of flaws, each of us has their own share of insecurities to deal with. In Anamika’s case, it’s different. She was forced into this profession. She didn’t want to be who she is. And now she’s here and she feels suffocated because she always feels that she has done so much for her family, she never really did something for herself.

Perfection is truly an illusion. And when I get to portray these (flawed) characters, I see them with open eyes and not judge them for who they are. I enjoy portraying these characters because there’s so much truth in them despite them being layered. Like at one point she’s saying, ‘My life is so good, touchwood.’ and feels so blessed. Does she really mean what she’s saying? So those little things speak about who she really is. Not just Anamika, all the characters here have a lot of layers, and you’ll realise when these characters complete their arc, they are all connected and it’s just beautiful.

Your character Anamika is protective about her children and she doesn’t want any of her things to affect them. Has that ever happened with you with respect to the paparazzi culture?


Well yeah, there used to be irritations about the paparazzi. If you come out of the restaurant, there are so many photographers, and not everybody wants to be photographed. Not every kid likes to be photographed. I think that would be the greatest issue. But I give my kids the freedom. I say, ‘If you want to be photographed, that’s fine. If you don’t, you go into the car, then I’ll follow.’ So that’s how we manage it. And they’ve learned to deal with it. Now they’re old enough, when they were little, it was a little confusing for them, but now they are fine.

How does your stardom affect your personal life and your sanity?


I look at it as a profession. When I go in front of the camera, I’m a professional actress. And I know what I’m doing. I’ve read a script, and I’m reading it and I’m playing that character. I become that character for the camera, but once I go back home, I am a normal person, because that’s the way I’ve been brought up.

I mean, even when I was working in films, my mom used to scold me if my room was messed up and things like that. So that’s how I was brought up. And that’s how I am. When I go home, everything is back in the studio. I see my kids and I see my husband and it’s just a different life. I never really lost myself.

How have you maintained this position all this while?

It’s challenging because you have to reinvent yourself, you have to think out of the box. You have to think about what will appeal to people. Because not only is it about being famous, you also want to grow as an artist, you want to grow as a person. You want to go forward in life, always. I’ve never looked back. I’ve always looked forward, what else I want to do… So when I do that, and if it happens to be something very good, then everything else follows.

Think out of the box, try to do something different. I know people will tell you ‘don’t do this, don’t do that, it doesn’t suit you. You’re such a big star, you can’t be doing reels… you shouldn’t be doing that.’ I listen to myself. Be passionate about it, and you’ll never go wrong in life.


What are the drawbacks of being famous? Do your kids know that you are famous?


They’d better know I’m famous. (Laughs) Because they have lived here 10 years, and they do and they’re old enough now. One is 16. One is 18. So they do know because their friends talk about it. And sometimes they come and say, ‘Mom, one of my friends saw your song. You’re cool’. Like ‘okay, thank you!’ Sara says, ‘Yo, she’s so cool’.

Sometimes I think I’m cool. Sometimes they’re like, ‘What were you doing?’ But when I’m home, I’m just their mother. Now my second kid is on his way to college. So all the applications have to be done next year. He has to score well, he has to do this, he has to do that… So all that discussion happens in the house. I don’t think we discuss my movies so much. But when something new comes out, I show my kids. They give me their feedback. And that’s how it is.

You did take a break from acting. Was that a conscious decision? How did it feel, when you were off-camera?

It felt good. Because I chose to go away. I chose to get married. I chose to have kids. I did what I wanted to do. We all have our own dreams and having a family and all that was a big part of me. I love kids. I wanted to have kids. So that was a big part of my dream and I was living my dream. I just met the right person and I thought this is a person I want to get married to and I got married. I just have lived life on my terms.

Actors in the industry usually get away with anything, right? They will continue to romance young girls. It’s almost like the industry has a reality check, but they still don’t get it. Do you think actresses still struggle to get an age-appropriate role?


I think things are slowly changing. And for anything to change, it’s always baby steps. It doesn’t happen overnight. And I think as we mature as an audience, I think if you see even five years back, the audience has matured a lot because of OTT platforms.

And you know, they are getting exposed to films from all over the world. They’re watching Spanish movies, they’re watching Korean dramas, and seeing how the role of women is changing in society even in our own films. Like when I had just started and we started talking about women-oriented films. They used to be either a victim who has finally taken up arms or whatever, or they are avengers… like they are taking revenge because something happened to them. That used to be the only way they saw a woman-oriented film.

But today we have women who are characters, they are professionals. We have films being made on a woman who was a mathematician, a sportswoman, the woman who contributed so much to making Mangalyaan and all those kinds of things. So today you see women as characters and not just as someone who’s a mother, or who is taking the law in her own hands or something like that. It’s not extreme. It’s so real. The characters are very real. I think it’s just a good time for women to be in films. And I think things will change slowly.

The Fame Game releases on February 25 – exclusively on Netflix!