Kangana Ranaut and Munawar Faruqui’s revelations on being sexually abused as kids calls for attention towards what we should teach our kids on child sexual abuse – Times of India

“I was 6 to 7 years old when I was sexually assaulted. They were relatives. It continued for 4 to 5 years. It was close family and I didn’t understand it then. Fourth year when it went extreme, they realised they should stop. I have never shared this with everyone as I have to face them. I didn’t find any use of telling it to anyone. I think my dad knew about it. He said something once that made me feel like he knows it but I don’t remember clearly. Now I think dad didn’t say anything as he might have felt the same…like how do you tell anyone about it,” Munawar revealed in the show.

To this, Kangana replied, “Munawar, so many kids every year go through this kind of harassment but no one discusses this on a public platform. Everyone’s touched inappropriately in childhood. This has been experienced by many including me. In my town when I was quite small, a boy, who was a few years older than me, used to inappropriately touch me. But I didn’t know back then what it meant. Every child has to go through this no matter how protective their family is,” and went on to add that, “Humare mohalle mein choti hi umar ka hi ek ladka tha but humse teen chaar saal bada tha. Obviously he was exploring his sexuality. Hum bache bahot chote chote the. Hum logon ko bulate the. Humare kapde utarte the. Humko check karte the. Hum paanch cheh saal ke the. Humein uss time pe samajh nahi aata tha ki humare saath kya ho raha hai. But yeh mujhe lagta hai kaafi badi parecentage bachon ki hai who go through this and there’s a huge stigma behind this specially for me.”

Both Kangana and Munawar have talked about how they were ignorant of the fact that they were being molested then. It was later they realised how wrong was what happened to them.

Child sexual abuse: How we let it happen

“It happens”

“Do not talk about this before anyone”

“He is older than you. Keep quiet”

Many times kids are told this when they go to their parents with a complaint against their elder uncle or brothers.

Read: What to do when your kid has no friends

It’s time we actually listen to what kids say. Those unfiltered, unintentional and non-malicious complaints can save a lot if they are addressed properly.

As per the World Health Organisation, child sexual abuse is “the involvement of a child in sexual activity that he or she does not fully comprehend, is unable to give informed consent to, or for which the child is not developmentally prepared and cannot give consent, or that violates the laws or social taboos of society.”

The population of children in India comprises 19% of the total world population.

Indian government’s the Protection of Children from Sexual Offences (POCSO) Act, 2012 identifies several child sexual offenses.

Effect of sexual abuse on child

“Preadolescent sexually abused children meet full criteria between 30% and 50% for a posttraumatic stress disorder diagnosis, 30–40% for depression, 27% for conduct disorders, 14.3% for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, and 5–8% for obsessive-compulsive disorder,” says a study.

Child sexual abuse typically triggers strong emotions, including fear, uncertainty, shame, guilt, rage, helplessness, depression, and distress. Survivors of the abuse may consider themselves different, disgusting, and harmed.

How to identify if a child has been sexually abused?


As per a research report, the common physical injuries include bleeding, bruises, or swelling in the genital area, bloody, torn, or stained underclothes, difficulty walking or sitting, frequent urinary infections, pain, itching, or burning in the genital area.

However, studies have found that less than 5% of the victims show visible physical injuries.

Parents should therefore not ignore behavioral and social signs of the abuse like:

• Violation of laws and social conduct
• Poor academic performance
• Frequent absenteeism in classroom and in studies
• Showing more sexualized behavior
• Getting aggressive or showing violent behaviour often

How can this be prevented?

If parents can teach their kids about the abuse in a very gentle manner, the occurrence of this can be avoided.

There are several ways parents can help the child in understanding what is good and what is not good for them:

• Teach them about good touch and bad touch
• Teach them that there are certain body areas which nobody should touch and if anyone does they should tell this to you
• Teach them not to get lured by offerings like chocolate or pastry or a bike ride
• Teach them to come to you no matter who the offender is
• Teach them not to feel guilty if something like that happens
• Teach them not to keep the incident to themselves because the “uncle” or the “brother” told them to do so.
• Teach the kids few self defence tricks so that they can free themselves from the grips of the offender and escape
• Encourage them to share everything that happens daily; this way even you get to know everything and this can even help you keep your child safe from the possibility of abuse.