His/Her story: “My sister-in-law was sitting on my husband’s lap and they were watching an adult movie” – Times of India

Her story: I found my husband and his sister sitting in a very weird way. She is a 20 year old college girl and my husband is 28. She was sitting on his lap and they were watching Basic Instinct together. When I asked them what’s happening, neither of them moved, it was so natural for them… I have never felt so uncomfortable. I don’t know how to bring this up with my in-laws. When I tried talking to my husband about it, he got offended. How can I not bring it up? They are adults! What should I do?

His story: My little sister and I have been very close and we have our own inner jokes. My sister was sitting on my lap because she is like a kid and we were just watching a Sharon Stone movie. My wife found it disgusting and yelled at me for our behavior. I don’t understand what’s wrong?

Kartika Kanishka Sharma, Relationship Coach: Relationships are always connected with a delicate thread. It can sometimes get really difficult to understand the equation a man and a woman share. So you need to take your wife in confidence. You need to sit down with her and explain it to her. Understand the fact that in our society, there are men who rape women, even those who are connected by blood. So while you are right, you must make this clear to her too. If you do this with love, she will understand.

Nidhi Behl Vats, Relationship expert & Founder of the story of souls: Every house has its own boundaries and level of openness amongst each other. You need to understand this. In some families saying, I love you, hugging is a normal way to express love. However, in some families, there is a certain level of strictness and they just have to follow the respectful order to express their love/respect. You probably just need to expand your level of understanding. Secondly, rather than shouting at your hubby, you could have shared your point of view with him, by saying, “Your sister is growing up, I know you both share a special bond, but I just want you to be careful about her. So that she doesn’t get into any trouble these days! As our society is like that.”

So, by saying this you are not sounding offensive. He may be able to take this thing from the right perspective. Always remember, not everything is as it is seen. There could be more truth to the sentence. Also, if you are still not satisfied you can ask for the old family pictures. You can observe how the family reacts to their bonding. Maybe this would actually be normal for them.

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