Former NRL star Chris Caruana opens up on ice addiction that left the former grand finalist homeless

Former North Sydney Bears star Chris ‘Smoke’ Caruana has opened up on the horrific ice addiction that nearly claimed his life and saw the glamour boy of footy left homeless and without food and sleep for up to two weeks.

Caruana was a household name in the ARL and NRL in the 1990s with his flashy play and dashing looks who earned $400,000 a year at his peak playing for the Bears and the South Sydney Rabbitohs.

However an addiction to methamphetamine, commonly known as ice, ripped his life away from him. At his lowest ebb, Caruana admitted he would go up to two weeks without food or sleep.

Caruana, now 51, lost everything to his $3000 per week addiction and twice tried to take his own life. Now he has been clean for almost three years and the former NRL star wants his recovery to be the catalyst for more Australians to kick the devastating habit.

‘I’ve been in some dark places in the last four years. I just want to help the people out there that need a little bit of hope in their life. I think I can give it to them. I’m here to voice my stuff and you know, get it out there that I’m here to help,’ the former outside back told Today.

Caruana was a star for the North Sydney Bears and the South Sydney Rabbitohs in the 1990s, playing 157 matches and scoring 44 tries

‘I felt a very, very deep, deep space of depression and anxiety. I lost a lot of money through narcotics. Yeah it was a terrible, terrible 10 years of my life. You know what I mean. I wish I could take that back. It’s gone now. 

‘It’s all good at the moment. It’s all good. I’ve got some great friends in my life. I’m clean today. I’ve been clean 33 months yesterday which I’m really, really proud of. And I’m continuing to do the good stuff that has to be done.’

Caruana said his family was the catalyst for his recovery, including his children Kyle and Erinn.  

‘I couldn’t do it anymore. I was sick and tired of using narcotics but my family, especially my mother, my sisters and more importantly my children who have been my rock like Erinn and Kyle. That was the catalyst,’ he said.

‘I had to stop for myself because if I didn’t stop using, I can’t give any love and support out there to the people that love me you know what I mean, that was it, I just decided to give it away cold turkey and I’m clean today.’

Caruana pictured with his children Erinn and Kyle who he said were the major catalyst for him to get clean after a long addiction to methamphetamines

In the candid interview, Caruana opened up on the ravages the drug had on his body and his life during his darkest days.   

‘It’s a very, very nasty drug. It took away a part of my soul which I’ve got back. But longest I’ve – was you know, I was awake for was probably 12 days – the longest I didn’t eat was probably 14 days. I lost probably 24 kilos in 12 months,’ he said.

‘It’s an insidious drug.  

‘I’m looking at my daughter and my son today and yeah, mate, they’re the people I’m hanging in there for.’

The pain of the addiction was so great that Caruana has admitted that he attempted to take his life on two different occasions, but decided to fight for his family. 

‘Suicide was a big thing. I didn’t want to be here,’ he said. 

Chris Caruana of the North Sydney Bears offloads the ball during a ARL match at North Sydney Oval 1997, in Sydney

‘Its publicly out there that I did that. I won’t be doing it again because I want to hang in there for my family and children and especially the people that come in in the last two months.

 ‘This [quitting] is the toughest gig I’ve ever done. I’ve played first grade football but being clean is the hardest thing. I have the courage to do it.

‘Some thanks to some certain people. Firstly my family. And my children. They’re the most important people in my life. 

‘To Amanda Scott from [NDIS provider] iCare who in the last 12 months has put a roof over my head for the first time in probably four years. 

‘Last but not least, a person who has come into my life, a rock in the last month is Heidi Rawson making me accountable.’

For help in a crisis call 000. If you or anyone you know needs support, you can contact Lifeline 131 114, or Beyond Blue 1300 224 636.