Exclusive Interview: Kajal A Kitchlu on celebrating her first Mother’s Day with son Neil – Times of India

This Mother’s Day must be special for you. What are your plans for the occasion?

This Mother’s Day is definitely special for obvious reasons. I plan to spend the day with all the mothers in my life, like my mom, sister, sister-in-law and mother-in-law. It is going to be a lovely family dinner. I will take the opportunity to express my undying love profusely to my mother. I hope to be a mother like my mom. My sister and I bond with her like her best friends. In an earlier interview with BT, you had spoken about how you were inspired by your sister and sister-in-law to become a mother. Now that you are one, is it what you perceived it to be?

I have always seen my sister, who has one son and my sister-in-law, who has a son and a daughter, be hands-on mothers. They have inspired me, but experiencing it yourself is a different ball game. It is amazing to spend time with your nephews and nieces because you hang out with them, and then they are their parents’ responsibility (laughs!). But as a mother, you have to take responsibility of your baby. On a serious note, I never imagined motherhood to be so beautiful. It’s literally like having your soul walk outside your body. It’s like a part of your soul and the biggest part of your heart in a physical form. From here on, I only want to be the best version of myself in every aspect possible to take care of my child.

How would you describe the moment when you first held your baby boy in your arms?

My due date was May 5, but I started experiencing contractions on April 18. I was about to go for my routine stroll in the park and do cardio. I didn’t realise that I was getting into labour… it felt like regular pain, which would pass off. But soon, I was rushed to the hospital. You are so prepared for this day as you read and watch a lot about it. Through the nine hours of labour, I was chanting and taking mini naps. Then, the minute the baby was born, it felt surreal. They kept him on my chest. I was extremely overwhelmed. I am happy that it was a normal delivery. I was aiming and hoping for that as I had worked towards it quite a bit.

The post-delivery phase can be challenging for women. Many women are coming forward and talking about the post-delivery phase, where they battle postpartum depression and other emotional as well as physical changes. It’s been a little less than a month since you became a mother, how has this period been for you?


Physically, as we all know, giving birth is a painful process. Healing does take time. But then, women are very resilient. When you are in that situation, you understand what you and your body are capable of. So, regardless of the difficulties, it happens in a natural flow, and nature takes over. I am at my mom’s home now, and I have been indulging in all the traditional therapies, including massages, sauna, and eating healthy food. Mentally, the whole process has just made me stronger, more compassionate, selfless and a more loving human being. It also makes you more responsible. It’s an instant switch as you develop a natural maternal instinct. You change as a person and are far more mindful and careful and far more selfless in a way. About postpartum depression, thankfully, I haven’t experienced that so far. Thoughts about how you will bounce back crop up only when you are feeding your child alone at night or when you are alone in your room. So, every time I start thinking about how I can lose my extra weight or get back to work, I turn to my family. Every new mom is bound to be anxious about whether she is taking care of her child in the right manner. The only way to fight this stress is to have a strong core community around you to support you. And it does take a village to raise a child. Just find your strength in your village. That’s the only way to do it.

You worked through your pregnancy. How did you manage that, and how long do you plan to be on maternity leave?

I was working till two days before my delivery. The last thing I shot for was a TV commercial. Whether you think it’s easy or difficult depends on how you perceive it. Yes, physically, it was challenging to work through the pregnancy. So, I participated in certain classes, and I did an entire parenting workshop with a renowned counsellor. I was also doing Iyengar yoga and cardio. I wanted to be ready in a way where I felt I was prepared to become a mom and, at the same time, work as an artiste. Nothing is simple and you have to work towards what you want to do. I hope to start working again in August. But if it takes longer, I will extend my maternity break, as my child is my number one priority.

You have named your baby boy Neil. Who chose the name and what was the idea behind it?
My husband and I shortlisted a lot of names over several months. We wanted a name that would be short and easy to pronounce. I always wanted a name based on either Lord Shiva or Lord Krishna. Neil is derived from Neelkanth, which is one of Lord Shiva’s names. We loved it and decided to go ahead with it.